


Just a Moment

by GrotesqueEnchantment



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Children, Cunnilingus, Emperor Kylo Ren, Empress Rey, F/M, Jealousy, Missionary Position, OC Stormtrooper, Pregnancy, ben solo is a kink for us all, dark!rey but only a little bit not a lot a bit, will update as we go - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-26 22:14:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21896281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrotesqueEnchantment/pseuds/GrotesqueEnchantment
Summary: “I took your hand,” She grits her teeth, bares them and hisses. “Because I was a fool girl who wanted to love you. Even if just for a moment.”
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 60
Kudos: 261





	1. Chapter 1

“Honey, wake up.”

She kisses her forehead, soft and loving, and brushes the hair behind her ears. Big brown eyes open slowly, sleep still clouding their vision. A small hand comes up and rubs at them, tries to focus her vision. She smiles and reaches up, wraps her small arms around the woman’s neck.

“Mama!” She squeezes and holds on tight. The child squeals when her mother moves back and lifts her up off the bed. Her giggles fill the small room, a little light to start the morning. A bubble of a laugh escapes the mother’s mouth and she put her child down onto the ground. The child’s sleep weak legs almost give out but she gets them under control and stands tall next to her mother.

“Alright, what do we do in the morning?” Her mom asks with a smile. She grins back up at her mom.

“We shake out the sleep!” As if on cue, both of them begin to shake and dance. Their arms come up into the air, continue their shaking. They both laugh now, joyous and full. She kicks at the floor, scuffs up the wood even more. The wood happily displays the years of shaking they’ve done. What’s little more dancing for it?

The child falls to the ground, her chest heaving with laughter. Her mother stops her dancing and kneels down. She grabs the child’s hand and pulls her up and into a hug. She presses a small kiss to the child’s temple and rubs her hair.

“Let’s get dressed kiddo.”

****

“Mae.” Her mother stands before her, fists on her hips. Mae refuses to look at her mother, instead kicks at the rocks on the ground. “Mae, I’m not mad.” Her mother says and she sure sounds mad.

“You seem mad.” She says it lowly. She hears her mother sigh and hears the soft shifting of fabric. Her mother’s hand comes up to her shoulder and squeezes gently. She lifts her eyes then and is greeted with her mother’s soft smile.

“I’m sorry.” Her thumb rubs into Mae’s shoulder. She sighs again and brings her other hand to Mae’s opposite shoulder. “Mama didn’t mean to sound mad.” She brings her hand off Mae’s shoulder and to Mae’s small hand. She takes the small electronic within it. “She just worries. She doesn’t want anything to happen to you.”

She takes her other hand away from Mae’s shoulder and moves back. She’s sitting on the heels of her feet and examining the electronic within her hands. She turns and twists the dials, brings it up to her ear to listen. Her smile instantly vanishes from what she hears.

She takes the electronic away from her ear and puts it into her back pocket. Her hands come back up to Mae’s shoulders. Instead of a smile, this time her brows are furrowed and her lips are set into a firm line.

“Mae, do you remember why we don’t keep these?” She asks. Mae refuses to meet her eyes and looks back down at the ground.

“I’ll hear something bad.” She says lowly. Her mother doesn’t say anything for a moment so Mae looks up. Her mother’s eyebrow is lifted, waiting for Mae to continue. “and bad people can use it to hurt me.”

Her mother nods and moves back to sit on her heels. Mae hates this. When her mother looks sad like this. Even when she puts on that smile. Mae knows that something is upsetting her mama but she never tells her what.

“Yes.” Her mother says and breathes out through her nose. She pats Mae on the shoulder before coming up to a stand at her full height. She reaches her hand down and out to her daughter. Mae slots her little hand in her mother’s and is enveloped in warmth. The contact makes her mother smile, happy and real.

“Alright. Now that’s been established,” She begins and starts walking, moving Mae with her. “We’ve gotta finish up our chores.” Mae groans and her shoulders drop. She tries to pout up to her mother but her mother shrugs.

“I mean the chores are up to you but the device,” She stops looking at Mae and keeps her gaze steady forward. “I’ll just have to yell at Uncle Poe and Finn for giving it to you.” She says it so nonchalantly with a shake of her head and with a grin on her lips. She swings her arm so Mae’s arm swings too, like they’re playing. Mae grips her mother’s hand harder, wraps her other hand around her forearm to steady them.

“You can’t!” Mae pleads with everything her little body has. Her mother brings a finger to her lips, pretends that she’s thinking about it. She grips harder with every ounce of strength she has, and looks up with her big brown eyes. “Pleeeease!”

Her mother dramatically sighs. She brings her hand away from her mouth and down to the top of Mae’s head. When her mother ruffles her hair, everything feels right. She beams her biggest smile upwards to say thank you.

“Alright, kiddo. I won’t this time.” 

****

“Mama,” She whispers against the dark. A hum vibrates through her mother’s chest, encourages her to keep going. Her hand continues to rub small circles on her head, tries to lull her into sleep. “Please tell me again.”

“My light-” Her voice rumbles in Mae’s ear. The sigh in her voice is evident. The hand on her head hesitates. So, Mae cuts her off.

“It helps me sleep.” She pouts. A small laugh comes from her mother than. The hand in her hair continues. The weight is nice and Mae closes her eyes. Ready to listen to her mother’s soothing voice.

“If it will help.” Her mother clears her throat. “Once upon a time, in a galaxy far far away there was a girl.”

“That’s you!” Mae interrupts. Her mother laughs and pats her head.

“You said you’d sleep.” She can hear the eyebrow quirk in her mother’s voice. Mae digs her head into her mother’s chest. The moment of silence must be enough since her mother continues the story.

“There was a girl and there was a boy.” The hand on her head moves to her back. Rubs gently and comfortingly. “They were connected by something special.”

“The Force.” Mae lets the words slip from her lips. Her mother jostles her slightly. “Sorry.” She mutters under her breath.

“The force connected them with something special.” She squeezes Mae gently. “And they loved each other so much.” She brings her other hand up to encircle Mae. “Just like Mama loves you.” Mae giggles at the attention.

“So much that they would follow each other to the end of the world.” This is the part where Mama loses her smile. Something sad always in her eyes. “But one day, the boy went somewhere where the girl could not go.”

“But he left her a present.” Her voice is a whisper now. “A gift.” The softness lulls her eyes, evens out her breath. Her favorite part a ghost in her memory as sleep takes the child.

“He left me you, Mae Solo.”

****

“Wake up, my light.”

She wakes with a giggle today. Rubs at the sleep in her own eyes. Smiles as big as she can. Her mother returns the smile before leaning over the bed and placing a kiss on Mae’s forehead. “We’re in a good mood today then?”

She giggles and nods her head. She sits up and pushes past her mother. Places both feet against the worn in wood of the floor. She stands as confidently as a five-year-old can, places both of her hands on her hips.

“Alright silly, let’s shake off the sleep.” Her mother stands. She starts off by kicking out her left foot and Mae follows the action. Then she does the right and adds her left arm to the dance. Mae mimics it. Sooner than later, they’re dancing and shaking every limb. Their laughter fills the small room.

Both of them fall backwards onto the bed. Chests heaving from laughter. Her mother turns her head towards her. “Let’s get dressed and eat some breakfast.”

As if on cue, Mae’s stomach growls. They both turn to each other, eyebrows raised as if they were caught doing something. She jumps up and rushes to the dresser. Quickly pulls off and on her day clothes.

Her mother doesn’t share the same speed. She takes her time getting ready. Like she’s trying to memorize something. Tries to engrain something into her memory. Every morning, Mae watches in fascination from the table.

It isn’t until this morning that she sees the mark on her mother’s arm.

“What happened Mama?” Her voice breaks the silence. She points her finger at the mark. Her mother pauses in putting on her shirt, tries to see where her child is pointing. When she spots it, she refuses to look at Mae and continues to put on her shirt.

“Mama made a mistake a long time ago.” The shirt covers the mark. “It’s just a memory.” She tries to smile at Mae. Mae would recognize that smile from anywhere.

“A sad one.” Mae’s eyes meet the grain of the table. She doesn’t like making her mother feel sad. Doesn’t want to bring up bad memories. Like the time she fell and scrapped her knee against the rocks.

“Yes.” Her mother’s body slots into the chair across from hers. “But she is thankful for it.” Mae looks up then, confused. Her mother smiles genuinely.

“I knew you’d be confused.” She places two plates down onto the table. The smell of fresh fruits rushes into her nose. Her favorite breakfast. “Eat up, we’ve got a long day ahead baby girl.”

****

Mae does this as much as she can. Tries to escape the boring chores that her mother makes her do. She understands why at least a bit. It’s important to keeping them safe. It’s important to make sure that they have enough food when food from Uncle Poe and Finn get low. She likes when they get low, though. It means she gets to see them.

She found this clearing days ago. She’s not sure how many, doesn’t really count the time anymore. Her mother told her she could play there, as long as she stayed there. In case something happened, her mama knew where she could find her. So, she sneaks away here as often as she can.

She’s drawing in the dirt when she remembers the night before. _The Force_ echoes through her mind. It was something that mama and daddy had. If they did, why didn’t she? Why _couldn’t_ she?

She picks her hand up off the ground. Closes her eyes and reaches. It feels silly, to be reaching towards nothing. She focuses even harder, determined to grab something. Determined to be heard and recognized.

Something, so gentle, reaches back towards her. A light pressure swirls around her finger tips and up her fingers. Moves smoothly up her arm and around her. Envelopes her in a gentle pressure. Flows slowly through her body and being.

“Mae!”

A scream bounces off the trees. She drops the rock she didn’t know she was holding and opens her eyes.

Her mother is across the clearing. Her chest is heaving, like she had run. Her hair hangs wildly around her shoulders. If she hadn’t run before, she does now. She makes it across the clearing in no time. She skids to a halt in front of her daughter and drops to her knees.

Her hands run all over Mae’s body. Checking for something. She thinks mama could be looking for cuts or bruises. She pulls her daughter to her and wraps her arms around her small frame. She squeezes her tightly. Mae only notices when her mother pulls away.

She had been crying. The tears streaked down her cheeks. Mae brings her hand up to touch her mother’s cheek.

“Why are you sad?”

Her mother swallows around something in her throat. Blinks twice to get the tears out of her eyes. She doesn’t meet Mae’s eyes. She’s thinking too quickly. When the thoughts have settled, she squeezes Mae’s shoulder’s and looks at her.

“I’m not sad.” She removes her hands from Mae’s shoulder and stands. She grabs Mae’s hand gently and starts to lead her out of the clearing.

“You were crying.” Mae says. “That means your sad.”

She smiles down at her daughter. That fake smile again. She _is_ sad. Mae keeps her gaze down at the ground as they walk.

“I did something?” Mae whispers it and kicks her feet at the ground. It causes their pace to stutter. Her mother squeezes her hand tightly.

“Not you.” She pulls ahead of Mae, doesn’t look back down at her.

“Mama will have to do something.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm hoping to make this seven chapters. It could be more and it could be less. I've had this idea in my head for a while now and only did TROS give me the inspiration to write it.
> 
> It is a canon divergence. It'll be more clear later on as to why.
> 
> I didn't really check for grammar and spelling but if you know me than this is classic behavior.
> 
> Please no discussion of TROS below!


	2. Chapter 2

Mae lingers in the door when she bursts back into their little home. It’s wrong to leave her in the dark, wrong to not tell her the truth. But she is so young. Too young to even understand what she’s done. Too young to understand that her power is beautiful and dangerous.

She watches with her dark eyes as her mother rushes around the small space. Her mother absentmindedly takes down her hair from the messed up up-do. Her brunette hair swings behind her while her she scurries around the room. Her brows are furrowed together, as if she was trying to remember something.

She comes to a halt in the center of the room. She looks towards the ground but doesn’t seem like she’s seeing. She’s lost in her own thoughts, something Mae has seen too many times. Mae moves from the door and into the small room.

Her mother’s gaze snaps to her then. She tries to comfort Mae with a smile. But her eyes don’t smile. Mae tries to smile back but it doesn’t feel right. No, it’s meant to comfort her mama but not her.

Her mother’s eyes light up and she snaps her fingers. She whips around and makes way towards their shared bed. She quickly lifts the mattress and leans it against the wall. She bends down and reaches for something that Mae can’t see. When she comes back up to a stand, she’s holding something similar to her electric device.

“Hey!” Mae can’t help but exclaim and points at the device in her mother’s hands. Her mother goes to the table and beckons for Mae to join her. She trots across the room and slides into the seat across from her.

“This is mama’s,” She begins and starts fiddling with the dials on the device. Mae watches, eager to learn. “She uses it for things like today.” The device flickers to life in her mother’s hands. A loud static noise erupts through the room and Mae covers her ears. Her mother twists a dial and the sounds lessens. “Sorry, baby.”

Mae hums an acceptance and continues to watch. There’s a small red dial in the center of the device. When her mother twists the dial on the left, the dial moves left or right. Mae doesn’t know what her mother is looking for, but her mother lets out a gasp of excitement when she’s found it. She brings the device up to her mouth.

“I know what I must do.” Her mother speaks low into the device. She’s telling a secret to somebody, is what Mae thinks. She brings the device away from her mouth and back down onto the table. Her mother’s eyes find her and look for a while. They scan her features, take in each detail. Mae beams again, giggles a little under her breath.

Her mother’s thumb plays with the dial for a moment. It rubs along the smooth surface, deciding to turn the knob or not. Her eyes turn sad again and her smile reflects it. She brings the device up to her mouth and licks her lips.

“I don’t know if I have the strength to do it.” It comes as a whisper this time. She places the device softly onto the table and presses a button. The static noise no longer fills the room. It’s a relief to both of their ears. Her mother’s fingers fiddle with the buttons for a moment as she watches her daughter.

“Let’s get ready.” She says suddenly and braces her hands on the table to get up.

“But we’re already ready?” Mae tilts her head and furrows her brows. Her mother stands and motions for Mae to join her. She’s half way across the small room when Mae stands. Her hands a twisting in her hair, pulling the loose hair up.

Mae moves to stand in front of her mother in front of the reflective surface. Mae smiles at herself in the mirror. Her reflection mimics the smile, so she does a dance for mirror Mae. Her mother laughs softly while working on the second bun in her hair. She sways her hips for a moment before moving onto the last bun.

Once the third bun is neatly in place, she brings her hands down into Mae’s hair. She’s as gentle as she can be, but the twists and braid always hurt her head a bit. The base of her neck has two neat little twists that are the starting point for the braid that goes down her little back. Mama always said that her grandmother’s hair but she doesn’t have any grey in her hair so that can’t be possible.

Her mother’s hands find Mae’s shoulders once she’s done twisting and braiding her hair. They gently squeeze and she kneels down beside her. Her mother keeps her gaze locked on Mae’s in the mirror. She kisses Mae’s cheeks and tickles her sides. Mae squeals and tries to evade her mother’s grasp, but she is too strong.

Her mother twists Mae so that she’s facing her. She rubs her thumb along Mae’s cheek.

“I love you.” Her eyes are sad again. “Mama will always do everything to keep you safe.” Mae doesn’t know why but it feels like something is telling her she too should be sad. She can’t though. She has to be strong for Mama. Her mother pulls her towards her again and kisses her forehead.

“Uncle Poe and Uncle Finn will be coming soon.” She stands quickly. Mae can see her mother bring her hand up to her face. She rubs at her eyes. “Mama needs you to stay here and wait for them.”

“Mama is leaving?” Mae looks at the back of her mother’s head. Wishes she’d turn around and comfort her. Her mother’s hands fist at their side. Her knuckles turn white.

“Yes.” Her mother moves forward, towards the bed again. She bends down and picks something up. It’s silver and glints in the light of the room. Whatever it is isn’t smooth, it has ridges all along the shaft. She can see her mother’s thumb caress a small button. “She will be back.”

She clips the shiny thing into a loop on her belt. It looks like it should’ve always been there. An old friend, like Mae’s toys. Her mother stands tall with the shiny thing clipped into her belt and walks back over to Mae.

“Stay here and be quiet until they come.” She kneels again. “Do you understand?” Mae nods slowly. Her mother smiles. “I love you sweetheart. I’ll come back.”

****

It’s a betrayal. Hot tears stream down her cheek as she walks back to the clearing. Is this how it felt for her own parents? Did they care this much? Did their heart break this much? Did they want to run back and never let her go?

 _It doesn’t matter_. She tries to tell herself. As long as Mae is safe. She will be safe. Poe and Finn would make sure of it. They’ll be careful. They always have been with her. They’ll be great to her.

_And if you don’t come back?_

She falls forward, knees colliding with the rough ground. Her fingers dig into the earth where they’ve caught her fall. Her lungs constrict, try to bring in air forcefully. The breaths get caught in her throat. Come out of her lungs stammered and wet.

She stares hard into the ground. Tries to get her body back under control. Tries to remember what was taught to her. To center herself. She can’t be like this. Not now.

She will come back.

Her jaw sets into place painfully. She pushes against the ground, forces herself to stand on shaky legs. Sets her eyes onto a rock in the middle of the clearing. Moves one leg at a time towards it. Slowly at first before picking up speed and running towards it.

The rock is smooth under her fingers when she finally reaches it. Cool to the touch. It will be perfect for what she has to do next. She braces both hands against it and hoists herself up. She stands on top of it for a moment before sitting down. She crosses her legs and straightens out her back.

Her limbs move like she’s done these meditations every day for the last 6 years. Body so familiar with the motions that she doesn’t realize her eyes are closed until her hands are resting on her knees. She breathes deeply through her nose and slowly back out through her mouth.

“Be with me.” She says it allowed. Tries to remind something that she’s there. She continues breathing through her nose and out through her mouth. Tries to push against something within herself. Get something moving. Open back up space.

“Be with me.” Her head lulls as a gentle pressure prods at her neck. Her limbs relax around the pressure. An old familiar friend. She smiles as it fills her. Slots itself neatly back into the place it was missing.

 _The Force_.

She exhales once more and opens her eyes. The world around her feels brighter. Full of life again. She can feel it. Sense it around her. It sings through her soul. The birds chirp loudly into her ears. She smiles into nothing but knows that something knows that she feels complete again.

She unfolds her legs and jumps down from the rock. The rocks around her feet hover off the ground. She tries to get herself back under control. Slowly extends her fingers and forces the rocks back down.

The life around her dims. Their signatures dull. The sound around her vanishes like it was shot out into space. She hears the breath leave her mouth. She closes her eyes, doesn’t want to see the light around her fade. She can feel a gloved hand reach through space and _pull_.

“Rey.”

The helmet floods her vision when she opens her eyes. Impassive and cruel. Emperor.

Fear grips her heart at the sight. She knew she had to do this. Get his attention. Rip it away from the strong force signature that came from her daughter. He’d want to know what could’ve caused such a strong response in the Force, would try to find the source. But she hadn’t thought of how to address him when she’d decided to distract him.

“Kylo.” She hopes it sounds as breathless as she feels. He rushes towards her, hands coming up instantly to touch. They start as her shoulders before moving down her arms. Her squeezes each of her hands before one of them comes to her cheek.

“Where are you?” She hates his voice. Hates that mechanical screech. Hates how she can hear the sadness even through it. Hates how even though it parades as a question, it is a demand. “Tell me. I’m close, I can feel it.”

She brings her hand up and covers his with her own. Even know, she wants to return his touch. Feel his own cheek and the ridges of the scar along it. She brings his hand down and tugs at the glove. She tosses with to the ground when it’s off and entwines their fingers. His chest heaves and she can hear his sharp intake of breath.

“I-“ His thumb runs along the back of her hand. “I think it’s the Anoat sector in the Outer Rims.”

He tilts his head. Feels that something is wrong but he doesn’t openly question it. Instead, he takes his hand away from her. He takes a step back and away from her. Again, she can’t read him. Again, fear rocks through her body.

The shrieking of a ship entering the atmosphere forces her to look towards the sky. A star destroyer looms in the sky and hangs. When she looks back down towards Kylo, he’s no longer with her.

She leans back against the rock, lets her back sag. She watches the sky, waits for the black outline of a ship to come rocketing down towards her. She brings her hand up and runs it down her face. Let’s her chest droop from a heavy sigh waiting in her lungs.

It’s only moments before his ship shakes the trees and descends down into the clearing. She straightens up, tilts her chin up. She must be the other Rey now. Can’t be so easily free like before.

Her heart pounds in her chest. She feels like she’s going to throw up when the ramp to his ship opens. The steam from the decompression hides his looks. Whether he’s worn his helmet down to meet her or not. She’s not sure if she’d feel relief to see him without it.

He descends the gangway, fists clenched at his side. He wears the mask and she knows it must be to protect himself. He doesn’t know her intentions. Doesn’t know why she’s finally opened back up to him after so long. Can’t predict her anymore. Doesn’t know who else could be watching.

He comes to a halt in front of her. Her chest moves quickly with her breaths. She tries to steady her gaze, keep it focused on his mask. He bows deeply in front of her.

“My Empress.” When he rises, he offers his hand to her. She notices that it’s the one she took his glove off of. “By my side once more.”

His hand trembles slightly. Nervous like before. So unsure. She lifts her arm, ready to slot her hand within his own.

She draws it back, startled, when a rock bounces off his helmet. She whips her head to where the rock came from.

One little fist is clenched at her hip. The other hand is raised high above her head. Rey can see the fire burning in Mae’s eyes. Her heart stops at the sight.

“Get-“ Mae starts screaming but is interrupted. Kylo rips his hand towards Mae. His fingers flex as he pulls the young girl towards him. She glides effortlessly through the air and towards them. Mae is stopped next to him, held into place by him.

She struggles against the force. Wiggles in his invisible grasp. His head tilts as he examines the little girl beside him. He moves her so that her feet rest against the ground but he doesn’t let her go.

“Who-“ He begins but Rey cuts him off.

“An orphan.” She too hasty, she knows. He turns towards her slowly. Attention on her. It’s what she wanted after all. “I found her.”

“A pet then?” Rage runs through her veins at the voice. Boils her blood. Burns through the cells like electricity. Her cheeks burn and she looks away from him. She can feel his gaze burn into the side of her face. She turns back towards him, eyes hard.

Her lip curls and she snarls. “She’s mine.”

He lets out a breath and releases his hold. Mae runs to Rey and throws her arms around Rey’s waist. She cries into the fabric at her waist. Rey brings her hand to Mae’s head and rubs gently. Tries to soothe the panic from her.

“You can keep her,” He watches Mae’s shoulders shake. “until she’s come into her connection with the Force. Then she will be trained like the others.”

Rey’s free hand clenches at her side. She nods and bites back at any anger that rises into her throat. She tries to calm her breathing, stop the anger from being too transparent. He turns away from her.

“The people have waited for you for too long.” He knows she will follow. Knows she has no choice anymore. She pushes Mae along with her. Forces the little girl to move on shaky legs.

“As have I.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As normal, I didn't grammar check or spell check. So forgive me. T_T
> 
> They meet again!!!


	3. Chapter 3

Mae scrunches her nose and sniffles. The tears have subsided, but she still hiccups from the cry. Now, she looks around the cabin of Kylo’s ship with wonder. Rey knows that Mae probably doesn’t remember ships. Particularly, she wouldn’t remember something feeling as cold as his ship.

Kylo slips into the captain’s chair with ease and doesn’t look at Rey or Mae as he prepares to leave the planet. His limbs move on auto pilot, so familiar with the actions that he lets his thoughts take over. It’s the perfect time to talk to Mae while she has a moment. It won’t take long to get to the Star Destroyer, so she must talk quickly.

She gently taps on Mae’s shoulder to usher away from where Kylo would hear them. She doesn’t take her eyes off Kylo’s movements until a wall blocks her view. She finds a padded seat in a small enclave of the ship. She brings Mae over to it and pats the seat. Mae positions herself and jumps to sit in the seat. Rey kneels in front of her, hand on Mae’s knee.

“My light,” She whispers. She brings her other hand up to Mae’s cheek. She rubs her thumb gently to wipe away any stray tears. “Don’t be afraid.” She brings closes her eyes and brings their foreheads together. She swallows thickly. “I’ll keep you safe.”

She pulls back and brings her other hand up to cup Mae’s cheek. She rubs both thumbs into her cheeks. The steel of the ship digs into her knee painfully. She let’s a sigh leave her lips. She takes her hands-off Mae’s cheeks and puts them on Mae’s shoulders.

“To keep us safe, you’ll have to promise Mama you’ll do whatever she tells you.” She looks behind her to make sure that Kylo hasn’t left the chair. She can feel the air turbulence banging against the ship now. Not long before they leave the atmosphere of the planet. Mae nods.

“I’m serious, Mae.” She cuts the words short, tries to be stern. Mae’s jaw sets and her eyes harden. Rey would laugh at the cuteness if the situation wasn’t so dire. “Everything I say, you have to follow. Everything.” She shakes her gently to get the point across. Now’s the hardest part.

“You can’t call me Mama here, only Rey.” Mae’s head recoils at the words. She starts to shake her head no but Rey squeezes her shoulders again. “Yes, you can’t. Okay?” Mae doesn’t nod. Her sniffling renews and tears prickle in the corners of her eyes. “It won’t be forever, sweetheart.” She pulls Mae to her and hugs her small frame. “I’m still your Mama. I always will be.”

“Are they bad?” She wouldn’t hear the question if she weren’t so close to Mae. Her voice is so small. Rey nods quickly against Mae’s shoulder.

“Yes.” She pulls away from her. “They are.” She sighs and hangs her head.

“Okay.” Mae’s own hands come up to her face. She rubs at her cheeks. Tries to stop her crying. “I’ll fight them.”

Since this whole ordeal started, relief floods her chest. She barks out a laugh and bites at her lip to stifle it. She shakes her head.

“You can’t fight them.”

“Can too. I threw a rock at that big mean man.” She springs forward with enthusiasm. As if to emphasize her point, she points towards the wall. She knows she means to point at Kylo.

“You sure did, baby.” She tries to fight the smile on her face. It’s a worthless battle to fight, especially when Mae looks so determined. She ruffles Mae’s hair and stands.

“But let me do it this time.” Mae seems to understand because she stands as well. She tries to cool the happiness in her heart. Harden it so she may face Kylo again. The ship rumbles when it pulls into the hangar bay. There’s no more time. “Follow me, Mae.”

Rey moves to come back where Kylo can see them. His finger’s move deftly across the controls. Practiced and in control. Some of the only time’s she has seen him at peace. She stands a few paces behind him and waits. Mae stands behind her.

She jolts slightly when they truly land in the bay. Mae falls into her, not use to landing. She straightens the girl up, pats her lightly on the shoulder. Mae smiles up at Rey, thanking her without words. The smile falls when she sees Kylo raise from his seat. The doors to the ship hiss open, and the fog of exhaust seeps into the ship.

Kylo stops in front of Rey. He regards her for a moment, tries to decide what the next step should be. He reaches a gloved hand out to her. Means that he’s replaced his old glove with a new set from the ship. He means for her to walk out with him. Hand in hand, emperor and empress returned.

She squeezes Mae’s shoulders and Mae winces. She gentles her grasp and thrums her fingers to apologize. She bumps her knee into Mae’s back, tells her to start walking. She bows her head slightly towards Kylo and rejects his hand. She holds her head high as she descends the gangway. Ignores the squeaking of a clenched leather fist.

Heavy footsteps follow behind her, and his hand finds the small of her back as he walks at her side. Her jaw tightens at the gesture. She refuses to turn her gaze towards him. Instead, she keeps it straight. Refuses to look at anybody, even when she hears the audible mechanical gasps from the stormtroopers. Even when they bend at the waist, a deep bow for her.

Her eyes flick up towards the command center above the bay. Black figures scurry about, unprepared for her. He hadn’t told anybody why they’d come here. Didn’t mention the young force signature or even their Empress. She let’s her gaze fall from the figures and back down in front of her. Hux, surrounded by storm troopers, rushes down at them.

Again, she squeezes Mae’s shoulder, gentler this time, and stops walking. Kylo halts next to her, hand still resting at the small of her back. She may not be dressed the part, but she won’t let Hux push her around. She tilts her chin up, hardens her eyes. If Hux notices her movements, he doesn’t comment. She can see the anger boiling in his eyes and in his blood. He doesn’t hide it even when he bows to Rey.

“Empress.” Short and curt like always. He rises, eyes catching on Mae as he does. She pulls to little girl into her, holds her in place. When he speaks, again, he addresses Kylo.

“What is the meaning of this?” It’s a hiss. Hux hasn’t changed a bit. Whether that’s good or bad, Rey can’t decide yet. “Proper arrangements haven’t been made for _Her Grace_.” His eyes flitter down her figure. “Maybe that doesn’t matter for her majesty seeing as you appear again dressed like _that_.”

“General Hux, oh how I haven’t missed you.”

“It seems you’ve missed no one, Empress.” His gaze flickers down to Mae and his eyebrow raises. It’s a slight at her and Kylo. Good, let him think Mae is nothing but a bastard child. The less he suspects, the less of a target Mae will be. She can feel Kylo’s hand at the small of her back clench into a fist.

Hux crumples to the ground, gasping and choking for air. His hands come up to his throat, tries to breathe around an unseen force. Rey whips her head towards Kylo. He has his hand raised, fingers outstretched, towards Hux. Mae jumps back with a gasp, tries to slink even further into Rey.

“You speak to the Empress, dog.” The cold mechanical voice hisses. His fingers relax and Hux takes gulping breaths. He scampers against the ground, tries to get back onto his feet quickly. Kylo’s hand returns to his side, fist clenched. “Do not make me remind you again.”

She doesn’t realize she’s been smiling until Hux’s gaze burns into her. She turns her gaze away from his. Reminds herself that this had been the reason she left in the first place. Tries to bat away the dark delight grabbing at her heart. Centers herself with a deep breath in and a slow breath out.

Hux clears his throat and stands. Bows once more to apologize. They both know that it’s fake. Only meant to calm Kylo for the time being. It’s enough for now. Hux raises again and looks towards Kylo.

“Make whatever arrangements are required.” Kylo says to Hux with a nod. “As you have so crassly put it, she will need her old clothing back.” Rey wants to protest, but instead bites at her lip. Kylo’s hand gestures towards the top of Mae’s head. “Take the child to the student’s quarters.”

“No.” The dark swells again. It prickles at the back of her neck. “You won’t be taking her anywhere.” Both her arms come in front of Mae’s chest, crossing to form an ‘x’. Mae looks up, tries to see her mother’s face. Rey can’t look at her now. Must keep her gaze locked with Hux’s. Kylo’s hand relaxes at the small of her back so she continues.

“She’s been alone enough.” Hux’s eyebrow twitches. “She’ll stay with me.” Kylo’s fingers thrum against the small of her back. He’s amused by their bickering. When Hux looks away, it feels like a small victory. But he ignores what she says and instead turns towards Kylo.

“I do as my Emperor commands.” He hates saying it, she knows. But he’ll do what he must to win the battle. She bites at her lip, irritated. “And my liege has commanded I take the child.” Hux’s hand moves for Mae’s shoulder.

“You do as is commanded by the crown.” Kylo’s hand catches Hux’s. “And my Empress has commanded.” Hux rips his hand away from Kylo’s. Hux’s hand goes to the bottom of his jacket, tries to straighten himself out. Kylo looks towards Rey and then down towards Mae. She’s won this battle. “This issue will be discussed amongst ourselves.”

She hasn’t won the war. She bows her head towards Kylo, acknowledges his terms. She lets the delight of her victory flow across her face in a smile and looks back towards Hux.

“General.” She tilts her head towards him. He bows again and turns on his heel to leave. His shoulders are tense in his back. The stormtroopers follow him, snickering amongst themselves.

Kylo pushes at the small of her back, indicates for her to keep moving forward. She taps on Mae’s shoulder and she walks forward too. She let’s Kylo guide them in silence. The hall ways are familiar and yet strange. She should know where they are and yet she can’t recall.

Mae looks around in awe of everything. The world was already so big to her. Seeing all the steel and flashing lights must feel like a circus to her senses. Even if there was no life, Mae could find the beauty in anything. She let’s a small smile across her face at the thought.

Kylo stops them in front of a door. He opens the door for them. Inside is a small room, bathed all in white. In the corner is a small cot, meant for one person. Her gestures them to walk inside. Rey let’s go of Mae’s shoulder and Mae rushes in. She runs her fingers along the wall and everything she can touch. Rey watches her from the center of the room. Kylo comes to stand beside her.

“She cannot remain at your side.” He starts. She swallows hard. “But I can allow that she stay here for now.” She can’t tell what he feels. She tires to reach to him through their bond but finds that he’s closed himself off to her. “She’ll join the other students.” She goes to protest, but he raises his hand. “This is all I can allow.”

She bites the anger down. She’ll talk to him again about this. She doesn’t want to upset Mae by fighting with Kylo. Doesn’t want Mae to think she’d have to protect her mother. Doesn’t want to interrupt her child curiosity.

He watches Mae for a moment. She wonders what he’s thinking. Does he want to know anything about her? Her name? Does he know who she is? Was it wrong to hope that he wanted to know about her? She tries to quell the anxiety prickling across her skin.

“Tonight, you will join me in my quarters.” He whispers like a secret. A promise. Her heart pounds in her chest at the thought. “I will leave you to enjoy your time together.” He says it loud enough that Mae overhears. She stills in her exploring.

He stays a moment longer, watches her. Like he can’t believe that she’s there. Wants to take her all in. Afraid to leave her. Still, Kylo bows his head to her and she returns the gesture. He turns and she waits for the door to slide shut. Waits for his heavy footsteps to lighten.

She lets out a breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding. Her knees can’t hold her anymore. She let’s herself sit, gently eases herself to the ground. She hangs her head between her knees.

Footsteps patter over to her. She pulls her head out between her knees when Mae’s hand touches her arm. She places her hand over Mae’s and smiles. Mae tilts her head and beams. She does what she can to make her mother feel better. It’s something that Rey has always loved about her.

“The orange guy,” Mae starts. She takes her hand off of Rey’s shoulder and plops down next to her. She crosses her arms across her chest and huffs. “I don’t like him. He’s a meanie.”

Laughter echoes through the small room. Relief blooms in her chest. Mae giggles next to her. She forgets, for a moment, about the danger they’ve found themselves in. For just a moment, she’s back in their small hut. Through bouts of laughter, Rey agrees.

“He is a meanie!”

****

Mae yawns against her shoulder. She closes her eyes sleepily and snuggles her face into Rey’s shoulder. It’d been a few hours, now, of Rey and Mae trying to play. They’d jumped on the small cot until their legs got tired. Rey told her stories about ships like the one they were on. Told her about heroes of the light and villains of the dark.

She moves over and slots her hands under Mae. She hoists her up and into her arms. It’s harder to stand up with Mae in her arms, but she doesn’t want to disturb the girl by asking her to get up first. So, she struggles trying to stand with the girl bundled in her arms. Once she gets up, she moves across the room.

She moves the blankets back on the cot with one hand. It’s messy but does look undeniably comfortable. The cot squeaks quietly when Rey places Mae on it. She moves the blankets to get Mae’s feet underneath the covers. Then she pulls them up, covers Mae’s chest and shoulders. She tucks them into her sides, ensures that Mae will be warm.

Once she’s happy with how she’s tucked Mae in, she brings her hand up to Mae’s cheek. She rubs gently, tries to lull her into a deeper sleep. She leans forward, cups both cheeks in her hands, and kisses Mae’s forehead. The girl sighs contently and snuggles further into the bed.

Rey moves back and watches Mae sleep a little longer. Memorizes her peaceful face. She moves on autopilot away from Mae. She tries not to think about how upset Mae will be when she wakes and Rey isn’t there. Tries not to think of her daughter alone.

Her hand lingers at the door. She’ll come back before Mae wakes. She’ll make sure Kylo is asleep and then she can come back. He can’t stop her that way. The thought comforts her and let’s her move past the door.

She finds the nearest storm trooper. Not that it’s difficult. They floor the whole ship. They bow to here, clunky like always. It draws out a smile. She asks where to find her rooms, as she is unfamiliar with the ship. The Stormtrooper is eager to take her there, whether to please her or to not draw her wrath is unsure.

In no time, they stand before the doors to the Emperor’s quarters. She assumes anyway. Would make the most sense for the Stormtrooper to assume the Empress would stay with the Emperor. She gulps.

“Empress.” The Stormtrooper bows deeply. “If I may speak freely?” She tries to find a number, but can’t find one. She touches the trooper’s shoulder gently, indicating for them to rise. They do, a bit too quickly, too eager to be near her.

“Please.” She doesn’t know if the Stormtrooper can see her smile slightly. The trooper shifts their weight between feet. Nervous.

“We,” They swallow down their nerves. “We’re glad you’re back.” She says nothing but nods slightly. The Stormtrooper clicks their heels together and salutes. Nods and then turns away from her. Back to patrolling the ship.

The door is even more foreboding now. Combined with the Stormtrooper’s words, it’s that greater sense of self again. That gnawing feeling of being something she cannot. A duty that was never meant to be worn by her. Yet, she’ll pretend again. As long as it takes.

She walks in, chin tilted upwards. Plays the role of Empress and feels that power. Ready to confront Kylo Ren. She walks further into the white room but see’s no familiar shape of darkness.

He’s not here. Not yet anyway.

She lowers her chin and let’s her shoulders sink with a relieved breath. She walks more comfortably into the room now. The Star Destroyer isn’t the same as their quarters back the Capitol planet but it is familiar. She walks past the main quarters and into, where she believes, the bedroom should be.

Laid out across the bed is a blanket of black fabrics. Some look familiar, others are new. They’ve brought her old wardrobe out. She pinches some of the fabric between her fingers, feels the softness of it. She shifts the fabrics around, tries to find her favorite one. 

The fabric stretches and gives in the most comfortable way. She holds the dress up to her frame, inspects it. It should still fit, although a bit tighter in some places. She pulls it away from her body and looks at it. Then she looks down at herself. Her clothes are filthy. It would be good to get changed. Feel refreshed and more like herself.

She bundles the dress into her arms and walks towards another door in the room. If the floor plans are similar than this should be a bathroom. She pushes the door open and the soft scent of soap fills her nose. She shuts the door behind her.

She strips without ceremony. Takes down her hair with no flair. Washes as quickly as she can under hot sterilized water. Get’s out, dries herself and her hair. The dampness of her hair will dry in time. She twists and pulls it back into three buns at the back of her had.

She steps into the dress and pulls it up. She slots her arms into the long sleeves of the dress, the mesh comfortable against her skin. The scar on her arm visible through the fabric. She zips the dress up at the side. The fabric at her waist is tighter than before but the cutouts in the side allow for some give. She examines herself in the mirror. It looks good. She admires what little softness she has in her stomach. Knows that it helped create something so beautiful.

She’s slept in the dress more times than she could count. Long nights working with General’s and governors. Long nights spent with Kylo Ren. She blushes at the thought and tries to bat it away. No need to get worked up. He’s not here anyway.

She walks out of the bathroom, distracted by her thoughts. She could start poking around. Try to find what has been happening since she’s been away. Try to see what damage has been caused. He was never good at running the day-to-day duties of the empire. Had no patience for politics.

“Rey.” Unfiltered, the deep bass of his voice rings through her ears. She turns towards the doorway of the bedroom. He fills the entire frame of the doorway. His mask is off, probably placed on one of the podiums in the entryway.

“Kylo.” The air leaves her lungs. She wasn’t ready to face him, not yet anyway. He moves in and towards her. His gaze rakes over her body, takes in the sight before him. She forgot how intense his gaze could be. She can’t meet his eyes. She moves her hands across her body, tries to hide herself.

“ _Rey_.” It comes out like a growl. She looks up and he’s filled her vision. His hands come up to hers, take them away from her body. “You don’t need to hide from me.” His eyes are wild, eager to take her in. “You look ravaging.”

He places one hand at her hip and gently moves her. They switch places, her back now towards the doorway. He backs her up slowly. Moves slowly as to not frighten her. She places her hand on his cheek, rubs the scar. He sucks in a breath at the softness.

“I-“ She takes her hand away from his face. Brings it back down to her side. She came here to talk terms with him. Not to be swept away in him. “I didn’t come to look ravaging.” She takes a step away from him. She tightens her jaw and swallows.

“I came to talk terms.” She puts command behind her voice. That practiced effort of an Empress.

He straightens at her voice. His expression hardens into steel. His eyes bore into her, heat and anger swirling into one.

“You,” In one word, he’s Emperor Ren. “You have been missing for six years and wish to speak terms?” He swallows hard. His fists clench and unclench at his side.

“Yes, about-“ She’s cut short when his hand dash out and grabs her. He twists her, brings her back to his chest. Holds her too him with one large arm across his stomach. He dwarfs her, tries to envelop her.

“The bastard child, I know.” He hisses it in her ear. The heat of his hands finds her thighs. Tries to push her back even further into him.

“If you wanted one so bad,” He kisses at the spot behind her ear. Bites at the tip of her ear. “I would’ve happily given you one.” It’s hard to breathe with him invading her senses. His touch causing heat to spike at the base of her spine. He pushes her hips back and presses his own hips forward. The weight of him rubs against the curve of her ass.

“I still will.” His hand skirts up the length of her chest. Comes up to cup the swell of her breast. He nips at her neck, forces little hiccups of breath from her lungs. His other hand leaves her hips, tantalizing slowly travels south. The heat of his hand on her through the fabric draws a small moan from her lips. A small satisfied laugh echoes in her ear. “One that’s better. One that’s _mine_.”

The heat in her veins turns cold. She pushes his hands off of her and pushes away from him. She whirls around to face him. Wonder’s if she looks as disheveled as he does. As wild as he does.

“You will not,” She muster that darkness in her heart. Tries to put venom in her words. Tries to put that dark commanding sway in her words. “Speak of her that way.” She clenches both of her hands. Feels her nostrils flare. “She is the best gift I’ve ever been given.” His eyes darken.

She hears that dark whisper in her mind. Tells her to find something, anything, to cause pain. That burning electric anger in her veins. She wonders if his feelings bleed into her own. Causing the amplification of anger. She stands straight, tilts up her chin, and glares him down.

With as much righteousness as she can muster, she twists on her heel. Rushes out through the doorway as quickly as she can. She hopes she struck him dumb. Enough so that she has enough time to leave before he comes to his senses. If she isn’t fast enough, he’ll keep her there.

She shudders at the thought. Not that he would hurt her, not that she thinks he would, but it’s been a long six years. She can’t know if he is the same as before or not. With that little display, she’s inclined to believe he isn’t.

She tries to walk as calmly as she can out of his quarters. Can’t help the little skip when the doors close behind her. She whips her head around, makes sure that no one is around. When it doesn’t appear that anybody is around, she breaks out into a run.

The fabric around her legs makes it difficult. The downside of dresses. But she pushes forward regardless. Let’s her feet take her to the only other room she knows. She focuses in on Mae, hopes that he won’t come for her there. Hopes that the man she once knew was in there somewhere.

Her chest heaves when the door to Mae’s temporary quarters opens. She scans the dark room, tries to find the cot. Her eyes adjust and she can see the lump on the bed. She quickly moves across the room and to the cot. She kneels besides it.

Mae has obviously moved through her sleep. The blankets are rumpled and untucked. Obviously unused to sleeping by herself. Rey stands back up and tries to maneuver herself. She gently moves Mae to make room for herself. Mae lets herself be moved, used to this from their bed back at home. When Rey has squeezed herself into the small bed, Mae adjusts appropriately.

She curls her arms around Mae’s frame. Tries not to squeeze too tightly. She rests her chin on the top of Mae’s head. Lulls herself with the feel of Mae’s heartbeat against her chest. Let’s the soft pulse in the Force comfort her. She closes her eyes.

Tries not to dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi my name is Danni and I still don't check for spelling or grammar problems.
> 
> Ohoh~ things get a bit steamy up in here. Not in the best way though. But do not fret! Steamy will happen in good ways too.


	4. Chapter 4

_His hand is outstretched to her. Shakes slightly with nerves. Or is it excitement? The adrenaline after a battle? The rush of the kill?_

_Her skin prickles the same way. Shakes the same way. With excitement or nerves she doesn’t know. She reaches for him. How easy it would be to steady herself in him. To take his hand and to follow him. Kylo Ren._

_She recoils her hand slightly at the thought. She had come here to save Ben Solo. Not to follow Kylo Ren into oblivion. Not to lose herself into that darkness._

_He takes a step towards her again, silently asks her to reconsider. The fear flashes in his eyes then. That fear of loss. To be alone. The fear of losing someone who saw him._

_Ben Solo is with her again. He is not lost. Only hiding. She swallows hard. Reaches for his hand and slots her own within his._

_She can coax him out. She can help bring Ben Solo out of the dark._

****

The wet press of lips against her forehead cause her eyes to flutter open. Mae sits up, smiling down at Rey. She brings her hand to Rey’s nose and presses quickly against it. Rey blinks away the sleep and smiles back at Mae. The little girl giggles and moves away. She dangles her legs off the side of the bed for a moment before hoping off.

Rey sits up, stretches her arms up. Tries to pop out of the sleep in her bones and muscles. She groans before flopping her hands back down on the bed. She watches Mae dance a moment in the center of the room.

“Good Morning, silly.” Her voice is heavy with sleep. Mae comes bounding up to her and throws her arms around Rey’s waist. “You’re in a good mood today.”

“We got presents!” Mae exclaims and bounces away from Rey. She moves towards a small table pressed against the wall. She bounces next to the table, looking at Rey impatiently. Rey stands and moves to stand next to Mae. Mae grabs Rey’s arm, bounces excitedly next to her.

There are two outfits. One that is meant for Mae and one that is meant for Rey. Both consist of grey’s and blacks. She pinches the shoulders of Mae’s outfit, pulls it up off the table. She holds it up to Mae’s small frame. It stills the girl’s bouncing.

It’s going to irritate Mae; she knows that for certain. The shirt is black, long sleeved and has a high collar. Is suppose to be paired with a loose grey vest that is wrapped around the body, held in place by a black belt. The pants are the same color as the vest, cut to end at the ankle. Rey looks back up towards the table and spots a pair of small black boots.

The fabric bundles in her fists. She’s seen outfits like this before. Not nearly as quality made but she knows what it means.

They intend to train her. Take her away and to the other students.

She hands Mae the outfit. She squeals and moves back towards the bed. Rey can hear the shifting of fabric, knows that Mae is eagerly trying to get the outfit on. Little groans fill the room when Mae struggles to get her arms through the long sleeves.

Rey brings her attention back towards the table. Towards the outfit that she’s been requested the wear. She picks it up, strengthens her muscles against the heaviness of the fabric. It’s not light like her current dress. The whole outfit is draped in black jewels, sewn carefully into the fabric so none will fall off. The front is cut into a low ‘v’ with black mesh meant to be the only thing hiding the pale expanse of her torso. The mesh is the same down the length of the dress’s arms, similar to the one she wears now.

“Woah!” Mae exclaims, bouncing back up to Rey again. Her brown eyes are big as the stare at the glitz and glamor. “Is that yours?” Her small hand comes up to the dress, rubs against the jewels. “It’s so pretty! You’re so pretty!” Rey tosses the fabric across her arms and moves it away from Mae. “I want one like it!” She shouts, hands trying to grab at the dress again. Rey bends down, presses her finger against Mae’s nose.

“Absolutely not.” She stands up fully again. Mae pouts. “Mama doesn’t even want to wear it.” She moves away from Mae, towards the bed. She places the dress on the bed, tries to lay it out nicely. Her hand finds the zipper at her side and starts removing the dress.

“Why not?” Mae asks as a small groan. She’s trying to reach the shoes at the top of the table. Rey laughs under her breath at the thought. Mae exclaims happily when she finally snags them.

“It wouldn’t like right on you,” She pulls the heavy fabric up and over her shoulders. Slips her hands carefully through the mesh fabric on the sleeves. Carefully zips it up at the side. The weight of it all is familiar and grounds her. “And it doesn’t suit me either.”

She turns to face Mae, the fabric trailing behind her. Rey rubs her hands together in front of herself. Aware of every bit of skin. Mae gasps when she sees her. Eyes big again.

“Pretty!” Mae’s shout echoes in the room. Rey’s cheeks burn and she moves towards the door. Mae follows behind her, cooing about each detail on the dress. “Like a queen!”

“Alright, alright.” She tries to make it sounds stern but her own voice is weak to her. Mae stops her cooing. Rey looks down at her. Mae’s eyes are full of light and joy. Excited to be seeing something new. Not knowing anything of what it means. Why ruin that? “It is pretty.”

Mae jumps and does a spin. Happy that she was right. Rey lets herself smile. Wants to take in these moments as she can.

The door hisses open behind them. Rey gently pushes Mae behind her. Stands tall again, tilts her head up. Mae’s hand’s twist nervously in the fabric of the dress.

A Stormtrooper walks into the room. They bow deeply to their Empress.

“Empress Ren,” The voice is familiar. She realizes it must be the Trooper from the night before. They do not raise until Rey has cleared her throat. “Emperor Ren has requested your presence.”

“Emp-“ Mae’s voice is quiet behind her, trails off into her thoughts. She knows that Mae is confused. Not sure why the Stormtrooper has referred to her mother in such a way.

“Thank you.” She pulls Mae out from behind her. Brings the girl to stand in front. “Will you be accompanying us?” She asks the Trooper.

“I had not been given the-“ The Trooper stammers mechanically. Rey smiles, moves steadily across the room with Mae in front of her. She stops in front of the Trooper and gives them a smile.

“I insist.” She tilts her head, silently asks for the Trooper to lead the way. The Trooper clears their throat, anxious to do as told. They bring a hand up, point for Rey to take the lead. She moves, bumping Mae’s legs to move too.

They walk down the halls in relative silence. The Stormtrooper has their blaster in their arms. Their fingers anxiously trace along the weapon. Meant to bring themselves comfort. She finds she does the same, rubbing small circles into Mae’s shoulders. Rey breaks the silence.

“What do they call you?” She turns her head, looks into the black nothing of the Stormtrooper helmet. The Trooper’s shoulders raise, tense.

“EG-170, Ma’am.” The answer is short. She looks away from the Trooper, forward again.

“You misunderstand me,” That power mixes with her words again. The intoxicating feeling of being Supreme for somebody. “ _What do they call you_?”

The Stormtrooper stands taller. Understands that she is not asking a simple question. She wonder’s if they’ve heard about her before, more so than just being the merciful Empress. If they’ve heard of her friendships. Of her battles.

“Eira.” It’s barely above a whisper. Eira swallows hard.

“Eira,” Rey repeats. Louder than how Eira said it herself. “A beautiful name.”

Eira’s shoulder fall. She sighs heavily, relief flows through her limbs. Her head turns towards Rey, the darkness in the helmet seeming to have emotion now.

“Thank you, Empress.” Rey hopes that Eira is smiling under her helmet. She should be proud of her name. It is her own. Eira brings her hand up to her helmet and clears her throat. “We’ve arrived.”

“I would like for you to join.” Rey starts. Refuses to move away from Eira.

“I should-“ Eira starts but Rey cuts her off.

“You should.” She stares down Eira’s helmet. Eira swallows hard again but nods once.

“As you wish.” Eira brings their hand up, requesting Rey to walk in front again. Rey smiles as she walks past her, gives her a slight nod of her head. Eira follows behind, but lingers in the doorway when they arrive into the room.

A large table takes up the length of the white room. Food lines the entirety of the table, ranging from fruits to meats. Her eyes follow along the table until they come to the black shape at the head of the table. Kylo Ren sits, fingers playing with the rim of a glass. She watches his eyes rake over her body, before they focus in on Mae.

Rey swallows hard at the sight of him. Mae sways against her mother, eager to move away and get a taste of the food on the table. Rey holds Mae against herself. Kylo motions for the two of them to take a seat. She releases Mae’s shoulder and she eagerly bounds up to the table.

Rey takes a seat at the opposite head of the table. Whatever hunger she had dissipates. She doesn’t take her eyes off Kylo as he watches the young child. Mae bounces around the table, picking up different kinds of food as she goes.

“What’s your name?” His voice breaks the silence. Mae turns curiously towards him. Her expression instantly sours. She watches as Mae’s body pulls tight. Watches as her little fists clench around whatever food is in her hand.

“Mae.” Rey barks it out before her daughter can answer. Mae’s head whips towards her mother. She eyes her daughter, tries to convey to not speak to him through them. Shakes her head so slight, hopes that Kylo doesn’t notice.

“Mae.” Kylo repeats. Mae turns head eyes back towards the food. She drops the fruits that were squished within her grip. She picks up another piece slowly. Acts like a kicked puppy. She brings the fruit with her over to her mother. Pulls out a chair next to her and sits.

“You threw a rock at my head.” There’s a bit of amusement in his voice.

“And it hit you.” Mae says so with delight. Rey brings her hand onto Mae’s knee under the table. Squeezes gently to tell her to not be so happy. Mae straightens again in the chair. She rubs her hands together underneath the table. Mae’s eyes are drawn to her hands.

“It did.” A smile tugs at his lips, but he does not allow it to break out. Mirth dances in his eyes. “Would you like to learn how to hit more people?”

Mae perks up at the suggestion. She takes her eyes off her hands and looks towards Kylo. She squints one eye at him, unsure of what to think of him. She tips her chin back.

“I already know how.” She says it low, still eyeing him.

“But only in one way.” He counters. She tilts her head. “We can teach you so much more.”

“Absolutely not.” Rey cuts in. His eyes snap to her.

“Shouldn’t she speak for herself?” He draws his attention back to Mae. “What do you think?”

“It sounds fun.” She says excited. Rey squeezes at her knee again. Mae turns her head back to Rey. “But I dunno.”

“How about we show you around.” He says. Rey glares down the table. It draws a smirk from his lips. “You can see for yourself if you’d like it or not. What do you say?”

Mae’s head turns between Kylo and her mother. She bites at her lip. Unsure. Rey can see the want in her eyes. Rey sighs heavily and nods. Mae excitedly turns back towards Kylo, nods her head comically.

“As long as EG-170 may accompany her.” Rey cuts through the excitement. Kylo nods and motions towards Eira. She moves further into the room and stands besides Mae.

“For the day.” He says to Eira. She bows her head and pats Mae’s shoulder. Mae hops off the chair. She takes Eira’s hand and is gently lead away. She babbles to Eira about some of the tricks she’s used in the past. Rey only looks back towards Kylo when Mae’s voice has faded.

“She’s too young.” She crosses her legs under the table.

“Others are her age,” He leans forward, settles himself better in his chair. “She’ll make fast friends.”

“You’re dragging her into something bigger than she is.” Rey sits back and crosses her arms across her chest. Huffs out, annoyed.

“She was dragged into this the day she was born.” He states it like it’s a fact. “ _You_ dragged her into this.”

She bites at her tongue. Swallows down her anger. Squares her jaw.

“You obviously wish to talk.” She spits.

“Yes,” He mimics her stance, arms crossing across his chest. “Your terms. I wanted to hear them.”

“You’ve already trampled on some of them.” She turns her head to where Mae and Eria left. “I didn’t want her trained.”

“She may hate it.” He lifts the glass to his lips and takes a sip of whatever liquid is in it. Rey shakes her head.

“She won’t.” She means to hurt him next. Even though it’s the truth. “Her father loves fighting.”

The glass cracks audibly. The cup is still whole in his hand, with an angry line stretched across it. She delights in the reaction.

“You already parade around a bastard child with a stolen name,” His voice is even. The anger laced in each word. She should be afraid and yet she can’t find herself to be. She straightens in her chair as he continues. “I will not allow you discuss a dead man.”

“He isn’t dead.” She says it flatly, annoyed.

“He will be.” The heat of his words travels down her spine. The mix of anger and possession deadly. Something tight grips at her heart, floods her veins with the heat of his words. She laughs and shakes her head.

“So cocksure in everything,” She smiles and leans forward. Takes her own glass in her hand and brings it to her lips. Says against the rim of the glass. “Emperor.”

“Am I meant not to be,” His eyes admire her again. She blushes into the glass. “Empress?”

She clears her throat and brings the glass back down to the table. Back to business, Rey.

“I want her to have her own quarters, away from the other students.” She says and sits forward. He starts to agree with a nod. “Near my own.”

“No.” He leans forward and places both hand on the table palms down. “Unless you agree to terms of my own?”

“Please,” She tries to poke at him through their bond. Know what he’s thinking before he says. He’s that impenetrable wall again. “What are your terms?”

“She may have her own near _our_ quarters.” He states it plainly but his eyes are full of heat. “And that you agree to an event.”

“What sort of event?” She ignores the first part of his terms for now. Even though it makes her heart race even faster.

“The galaxy should know their Empress has returned.” He sits back, takes his hands off the table. “An announcement would need to be made.”

“I see.” She brings the glass to her mouth again. She thinks about the terms for a moment. Nothing in his terms is out of the ordinary. Of course, he would want her to share a living space with him, it’s what they did in the past. Then Mae would only be a room or so away. And an announcement would make sense. Although he is feared, she was loved. The people would want to know. “I can accept these terms.”

“Good.” He says it contently. “I have one other request.” She hums, asks him to continue. He pushes out his chair and stands. The movement forces her spine to straighten. Her eyes follow him as he walks down to length of the table and to her. He comes to a stop in front of her seat and kneels. He lifts his hand to her, palm facing upward. She slots her hand into his.

“Would you join me tonight?” He brings her slender hand to his mouth. Kisses the knuckle of her middle finger. “As Emperor and Empress.” He kisses the knuckle of her ring finger. “As husband and wife.” He lifts his head and slots their fingers together.

“I-“ She swallows hard. Tries to bring moisture back into her throat. There’s hope in his eyes again. Like before from so many years ago. When she thought she could bring the man out from the dark.

“Allow me to remind you of my place.” He moves himself upwards, brings them closer together. “Weak to whatever your desires be.” His hand trails up her upper thigh. The heat emanating through the thick fabric. “Eager to please you.” His hand leaves her thigh, trails slowly up the length of her torso. She sucks in a heavy breath. “In body and in heart.” His hand continues its ascent. It wraps itself around the back of her neck, rubs his thumb soothingly into the base of her skull. “Please.”

It’s a whisper against her lips. His eyes bore into her own, waiting for permission. For acceptance. And how badly she wants to accept. To let herself be enveloped by him again. To take his soul and body in its entirety like once before. But she brings her hands to his chest and pushes him back.

“I need time.” She starts and he raises quickly. The spell broken too soon. “Give me that.”

“How long?” The pain flashes through his eyes. He tries to cover it as fast as it appeared but she saw. She knows. His fists clench and unclench at his side. “I’ve waited too long, Rey.”

“You’ll have your answer by the days end.” She stands. Crowds into his space as he’s boxed her into the chair. “Will that suffice?”

He nods and moves his body out of the way. He lifts his hand, allows her to move past him. Bows his head when he moves past. Calls after her.

“I will eagerly await your answer, Empress.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I didn't read it again because I am lazy and like to publish.
> 
> Also, if you can't tell, I really want them to get in bed together. Kylo and I both lololol
> 
> The only way I've been able to write this fic is by watching the Royal Albert Hall 25th Anniversary performance of Phantom of the Opera. I've seen this so many times now guys. Help.


	5. Chapter 5

She’d be the first to admit that she has made a lot of mistakes. Too long a list of missteps to even count. But her recent mistake became very obvious as she walked the halls of the Star Destroyer.

She was lost.

 _Honestly_ , she thought, _how much could change in Star Destroyers?_

If memory served her right, which it hadn’t yet, one of the training room should be up on the right. She walked towards it, eyeing the door as she drew closer. No grunting or pants met her ears. Instead, it was the annoying pitch of General Hux’s voice that greeted her. She pressed herself up against the wall as she grew closer to the door, wanting to eavesdrop.

“A surprise to me as well, Colonel.” Whatever they’re discussing, it sounds like an unwelcome surprise for Hux. “I thought her long turned traitor or dead.”

They were talking about her. Of course. She kneeled low to the ground, picking up the skirt of her dress so she was ready in case she needed to run. She eyed down the hallway, making sure that she was alone.

“Instead,” Hux continues. “she returns seemingly loyal to the crown and with a child.”

Multiple voices gasp simultaneously. Whoever Hux is with, did not hear the news about the child. Murmurs break out in the room, until one voice cuts through.

“The Emperor’s, sir?” The voice questions. Rey tries to search her memory of who could be speaking. She can’t recall the voice. How much had changed in the time she was away? How much power did Kylo grant the General? Hux’s voice cuts through the murmurs.

“There is a resemblance.” Rey swallows hard at his words. “But I’m unsure. The age of the child would determine her lineage.” Murmurs of agreement sound around the room. Rey makes a mental note to make sure Mae doesn’t tell anybody her age. She continues to listen to their conversation.

“It’s not impossible that the Scavenger Queen found someone similar to Ren to pass the time.” There’s a hint of amusement in Hux’s voice. The other’s in the room laugh as if they’ve all been told a good joke. Rey clenches her fist in the fabric of her skirts. Wants more than anything to rush into the room and remind him who she was. She let’s the anger wash through her, deep breath in and out.

“Regardless,” Hux continues. She can hear the squeaking of his boots against the ground. Knows that whatever meeting was held is drawing to a close. She hurries back to her feet, presses herself flat against the wall again. “Something must be done about the two.”

Ice runs through Rey’s veins at his voice. They had been back for all of a day and Hux is already planning to dispose of them. Rey turns back towards where she came from. Starts walking as quietly as she can away from the room. Let’s her feet carry her through the halls.

If Hux was anything like she remembered, he would do what he can to remove Mae from the picture first. It would be the easiest option, as Mae’s parentage was up for question. If he had been given more leeway to do as he pleased, Kylo may not question Hux. It would appear to be something simple. Like being sent away to train amongst recruits elsewhere. Then she would never see Mae again.

The thought flashes through her mind. The young girl with three buns screaming for somebody who loves her. Slimy hand in her own pulling her away from the ship in the sky.

_Come back!_

She’s replaced. The young girl now being dragged away by a Stormtrooper. Pushed and pulled roughly. Her dark hair trails down her back in a braid. Her big brown eyes filled with tears, screaming for somebody that loves her.

“Rey!”

A childish shriek pulls her out of her thoughts. She focuses long enough to see Mae flinging herself at Rey. Rey kneels and opens her arms just in time, bundles Mae up. She squeezes Mae against herself, maybe a little too tight. She digs her nose in Mae’s hair, reminds herself that Mae is with her.

She will not allow that dark glimpse to happen. She’ll do anything it takes.

Mae pushes against her, wiggles in her arms. “Too tight!”

“Sorry.” Rey let’s Mae go. Mae moves back, all smiles. She pulls on Rey’s hand.

“I made some friends!” She pulls Rey towards a room. This time, there are grunts and groans.

“You did?” She tries her best to smile for Mae. It’s hard when she can only see Mae screaming for her. Mae nods comically.

“Yep!” She pulls Rey into the room and along the outskirts of the training area. “I beat one of them up too!”

“It’s the best way to make friend-“ Rey is cut off when a voice rings through the room.

“Empress!” One voice starts. All sound evaporates from the room. She turns her attention from Mae.

The room is full of children of all ages. They’re all turned towards her, some stunned to see her there. A child in the center of the room is in a deep bow. She assumes this is the child that noticed her to begin with. As soon as the other children see that their friend is in a bow, they all mimic the stance.

“It’s alright.” Rey announces to the room. “Please don’t stop your training because I’m here.”

“But Empress,” The child in the center of the room raises. He’s a young boy, she’d think around the age of twelve. “I thought you’d come to train with us.” He laughs when the younger children around him look at him confused. Mae mimics their expressions. When Rey doesn’t say anything, the boy practically deflates.

“I-“ He stammers. “I’m sorry, Empress.” He bows again. He speaks to the floor loud enough that Rey can hear. “I thought you’d rem-“

“How I’d practically throw all you younglings around?” She laughs at the memory. The young boy springs up, a smile so wide she’d think his cheeks would be sore. She moves further into the room, comes to stop in front of the young boy. “How all of you would try to land a hit on me and none of you could?”

“I could now, Empress!” He sounds so sure of himself. Rey laughs under her breath.

“I bet you could. I must admit I am out of touch.” She lifts the heaviness of her skirt again. “And I am severely under-dressed for the occasion.”

The spell is broken in the room. The children around her laugh and come to circle around her. Some of the faces she remembers. Younger faces that she doesn’t remember causes her heart to sour. Kylo had promised her he wouldn’t allow any others. They all beam up at her. Each trying to get her attention. She raises a hand above the heads of the students, closes her fist. Each student instantly quiets.

“I see they still teach that signal.” She brings her hand back down. “What other sort of things has the Emperor been teaching you all?”

Each student suddenly doesn’t want to make eye contact. They push back and away from her. Even the young boy doesn’t look at her when he answers.

“The Emperor hasn’t taught us in a long time.” She watches the young boy raises his hand, watches his fingers as he bends them. “I can’t remember how to channel the Force anymore.” He hand falls back down to his side. “I’m sorry, Empress.”

She bends and kneels in front of the young boy. She brings a hand to his shoulder and gently squeezes. He raises his head and meets her eye.

“When did he stop coming?” She says it quietly, tries not to startle the boy.

“Emperor Ren hasn’t visited since you’ve been gone.” The boy’s eyes fill with sadness. “We thought he was mad at us at first but I think he had been too sad since you were gone.” She tries to comfort the boy with a smile. He smiles sadly back. “We were too sad too. We missed you, Empress.” 

She brings the boy to her. Squeezes him gently. “I missed you all too.” She pulls away from the boy. The sadness in his eyes is gone now, giddy with having been hugged by the Empress.

“If he hasn’t seen you all, what training have you all undergone?” She asks. Mae comes up to join her side, having pushed her way through all the students. The boy beams proudly.

“General Hux says we’re going to serve as the Crown’s Guard.” He excitedly points a thumb at his own chest. “I’m going to be EG-220.”

She doesn’t let the smile fall from her lips, even though her heart stops. She tries to stop her hand from squeezing the boy’s shoulder’s too tight. Tries to stop that darkness from grabbing her heart again.

She takes her hands from his shoulders. Clenches her fists in her skirts. She can feel Mae’s eyes follow her hands.

“Stormtroopers.” She doesn’t mean for it to sound clipped. “You’ll be Stormtroopers.”

“ _Your_ Stormtrooper’s, Empress.” The boy sounds so proud. So proud to be a pawn in a larger game then himself. Meant for greatness and reduced to a pawn in a galactic military.

“How about,” She stands. Looks around the room at all the faces. All the innocent faces of children who were talented in the Force. Reduced to a number. Remembers her decision from so long ago. “I talk with Emperor Ren and continue your Force training again?”

“Can you do that?” Once voice shouts from the back of the children. “General Hux says-“

“General Hux doesn’t know your talent like I did.” The crowd of children don’t seem impressed, so she continues. “And he is not the Empress.” The children cheer and giggle. The young boy’s voice cuts through the celebration.

“We’re glad you’re back, Empress.”

****

Rey follows the path that Eira took her before through the halls of the Destroyer. She walks past the doors that lead to Kylo Ren’s – her shared quarters. Further down the hall is another door. True to his word, the room has been converted into a new quarter. It’s a small living space, but she thinks Mae will like it.

Mae chat’s happily about the friend’s she’s made. About the moves that they’ve taught her. She asks Rey to watch her practice. Rey seats herself on Mae’s small cot. Rey watches Mae move in a practiced form, albeit a little sloppy of technique.

“I can protect myself better!” Mae exclaims as she kicks at the air. Her back leg gives out on her, however, and she crashes down to the ground. Rey can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of her throat. She quickly tries to cover her mouth when Mae gives her a cold glare.

“Well, maybe not yet,” Mae huffs. She pushes herself back up to a stand. She brings herself into the proper position again. “But soon!” She starts punching at the air again.

“I have no doubt.” Rey laughs. The door hissing open distracts them both. Mae falls out of her stance and turns towards the door. A Stormtrooper lingers in the doorway.

“Empress,” The mechanical voice of Eira calls for her. She bows her head towards Rey before bowing her head at Mae. Mae looks to Rey with a frown. “You’ve been requested by the Emperor.”

“Would you please inform the Emperor that I am currently with company?” Rey smiles and motions for Mae. Eira shifts her weight. She clenches her fists at her side

“The Emperor insisted I not return unless it was with you.” She sounds unsure of herself.

“Alright,” Rey sighs heavily. “I will go. Just give me a few more minutes.” Eira nods and dismisses herself. Rey knows she’s waiting outside the door.

“Why do they call you that?” Mae asks with a sour look. “’Empress’?” Her expression shifts, like she’s found an answer. “It’s the dress!”

“I guess partially.” Rey laughs softly and stands. She walks up to Mae and pats her head.

“Is that why you weren’t called Empress back home?” She tries to bat Rey’s hand away from her head. “Why Uncle Poe and Uncle Finn never called you that?” Rey let’s her hand fall away.

“No, no, that’s not why.” She answers softly. Mae grows quiet.

“Are you married to him?” Mae whispers, face turned towards the ground. “Is that why he’s the Emperor?”

Rey sighs heavily, let’s her shoulders fall. She kneels in front of Mae, brings her hands to Mae’s shoulder’s. Forces Mae to look up at her.

“Kind of.” She gently squeezes Mae’s shoulders. “It’s why I’m the Empress.”

“Why would you marry him?” Mae pouts, her eyes twisting in disgust. “Why not dad?” Rey shakes her head. Mae wouldn’t understand all of this. Not yet.

“It was a long time ago, Mae.” She takes her hands off Mae’s shoulders and stands. Mae looks contemplative for a moment.

“But you’re so nice.” She says it to herself, like she’s trying to wrap her head around it. “And he was mean.”

“ _Was_?” Rey asks with a raise of her eyebrow.

“He seemed okay today.” Mae says it with a shrug. “He said I could train and that was fun.”

“Well,” Rey moves towards the door. “Why don’t you keep practicing?” The door hisses open behind her, surprising Eira. “Maybe with Eira while I’m away?”

Eira stammers for a minute. Unsure what has occurred.

“That sounds like fun!” Mae bounces up the door and to Eira. “We’ll practice all night!” Eira nods dumbly, not knowing what she’s agreeing too.

“Go easy on her, Mae.” Rey bends down and plants a kiss on Mae’s forehead. “And if I don’t return before bedtime,” This time she looks up to Eira and starts to walk with her out the door. “Make sure she goes to sleep on time and doesn’t keep you up all night.”

Rey hears Mae’s shouts of indignation through the door as it closes behind her. She laughs under her breath. Eira turns towards her slowly.

“What did I agree to, Empress?” She sounds petrified. It forces a bark of a laugh past her lips.

“A great time, I promise.”

Eira shakes her head, brings a gloved hand up to her mask. Her hand trails down the front of her mask. She says nothing more as she escorts Rey down the hall. They stop in front of the doors she’s come to know as ~~Kylo’s~~ their quarters.

“He asked you to come get me,” She says it flatly. “Just to walk me down the hallway?”

Eira shrugs. “I just do what I’m told, Empress.”

“Well thank you for the escort.” She tries to sound sincere, but it sounds disingenuous to her own ears. “I’ll be fine from here.”

“Empress.” She says it with a bow. She turns and heads back towards Mae’s room. Rey watches as Eira’s form grows smaller and stops in front of Mae’s quarters. She laughs when she hears the squeals of excitement from Mae.

She brings her attention back towards the door. She can feel him waiting for her on the other side. Feels the anxiety seeping through the metal. She let’s his anxiety flow through her.

She should be as anxious as he is. Unsure of what waits beyond the door. But only a calmness washes over her. She breathes in deeply once and empty’s her lungs after. The semblance of a plan takes shape in her head. Let’s the image of a small girl with dark hair screaming flash in her mind.

_Anything._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi my name's Danni and this is a filler chapter with hopefully a bit more information. Also, I didn't re-read for spelling or grammar or anything like that because that is my M.O at this point.
> 
> Also, I just want it to be known, that next chapter's little outline I have is just "ITS BONE TOWN"
> 
> So hopefully we got that to look forward to. Who knows though. I don't plan this stuff out as I go.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hi! It's been a while!
> 
> Please note the rating change. It has been shifted from M to E. The smut beings after "“You’ll have me then?”"

“Don’t you think it’s a bit ridiculous,” She starts when the doors hiss open. Her eyes find his in an instant. With two steps, it’s just the two of them alone. “To have a Stormtrooper escort me down the hall?” All anxiety seems to vacate him then.

“Maybe,” He shrugs and walks forward to her. “I wanted to make sure you’d come.” He stops in front of her. Motions further into the room. Her eyes follow his hand. “Would you like to take a seat?”

He’s prepared for her. There’s a small couch now in the center of the room, flanked by two chairs. In front of a small couch are two cups sitting on a dark small table. Rey looks back to him before moving further into the room. She walks to the plush couch and takes a seat. She reclines back, enjoying the small comfort. She tries to see what’s in the cup, only can find that it’s red.

“It’s your favorite,” Kylo sounds anxious again when he sits in one of the flanking chairs. “At least it was.”

“Oh,” She says dumbly. She leans forward and picks up the glass. Kylo mimics her with his own. “Corellian wine then?” He nods and takes a sip from the glass. She follows suit, revels in the sweet notes on her tongue.

She puts the glass back down onto the table. Waits for Kylo to say anything. Instead, he toys with the rim of the glass. His fingers trace the lip. He watches her, shoulders tucked tight. She waits for him to say anything for a moment.

“I remember,” She starts with a smirk. “A time when you would talk to me about anything.”

“It’s been six years, Rey.” His eyes are sad when they look down into his glass. Rey bites her lip. “I’m not sure what to talk about anymore.”

“How about that?” She says. His eyes snap up to hers. “Six years is a long time when ruling over a galaxy. How is it?”

“I-“ He looks away again. “I’m not sure.”

“Not sure?” She crosses her legs. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve given most of the day to day operations to Hux.” He looks back at her again. Shame coloring his features. “I couldn’t bring myself to begin to unravel the intricacies you had set into place.”

“Oh, he’s going to have ruined it.” She sighs and brings a hand up to her face. She peeks at Kylo through her fingers. “Has he?”

He shrugs and she groans. “Oh he’s ruined it.” She brings her head into her hands. “It’ll take me ages to fix his mess.” She looks up at Kylo again. “If I am allowed, of course?” Kylo nods in agreement. She celebrates silently.

“What about you?” He asks and places his glass onto the table. He stands from the chair and moves to sit next to her on the couch. There isn’t enough space and his knees brush against hers. She moves over to give him more room. “What happened, Rey?”

She looks away from him, keeps her stare trained forward and answers. “The Resistance found me.”

“That’s what I’ve been told.” He sounds guarded. “But after that.” He brings a hand to hers. She turns to look at him. “You were gone, Rey.”

“I don’t understand it myself.” She pulls her hand out of his. “Something that was given to me maybe? Something kept around me to block out my connection to the force?” It feels wrong to lie to him. But she can’t tell him that she blocked herself willingly.

“You weren’t gone in only the Force, Rey.” His eyes find a spot on her arm. She brings a hand to rub at the spot unconsciously. “We couldn’t even pinpoint your location. Did they remove your implant?”

“Oh uh,” She stop rubbing at her arm and brings both hands into her lap. She keeps her eyes trained on her hands. “I had it taken out.”

“You did?” He’s confused. She bites at her lip. She still hates lying to him but she isn’t sure how much of it is a lie anymore. She did take it out so that they couldn’t track her; the implant having a dual purpose for the women of the royal household. That’s what she kept telling herself when she did it so many years ago. Hadn’t dreamed that it could’ve given her the best gift she’s ever received. She’d be lying to herself if she believed that even then she hadn’t hoped that it would leave her with that gift.

“Yes,” She looks at him purposefully this time. Swallows around the nerves in her throat. “You said you would give me anything I wanted.” She twists her hands together. “And I did want a family with you.” 

Whatever he was thinking before, she can see all thoughts vacate his mind. His mouth hangs open slightly at the revelation. When he comes back to himself, he takes her hands again. Tries to steady the shaking in his own hands.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He whispers it. Sounds like he can’t even believe his own ears.

“I intended to. The night of my abduction.” She swallows around the lump in her throat again. She can feel her cheeks flush at the thought of her next lie. “It’s why I wanted to go to the market that day. To find something nice to wear for that evening.” 

“And you couldn’t wait?” His voice cracks when he asks. A mixture of sadness and anger clogging his throat.

“I hadn’t planned anything once I was with the Resistance.” She finds her own voice barely above a whisper. The next part is the truth, even if the context is wrong. “It was an accident. A moment of weakness on my part.” She should’ve kept her hands to herself the morning she left. But how could she leave with saying goodbye to him?

“I was alone again. The spot you occupied empty due to the cutoff from the Force.” She heavily sighs. He takes his hands out from hers. “I needed anything to remind myself of you.” She watches his fist clench on his knee.

“A cheap knockoff then?” He says it lowly, dangerously. “A body like my own to keep you company?”

“What would you like me to say?” She whispers it. Puts her hand on top of Kylo’s clenched fist to calm him. She leans into him, rests herself against his chest and forces him to recline backwards. Watches his eyes fill with the heat of anger and something else.

“I was wrong to pretend.” She speaks louder this time. Her gaze flickers between his lips and his eyes. She takes her hand off of his and brings it up to his chest. She rubs small circles with her fingers.

“ _Rey_.” He hisses her name breathlessly and low. A warning she knows. But she can’t stop now. He lets out a shaky breath as her hand travels south down his chest. She leans up, brushes her lips against his ear.

“Wrong to think that anybody could compare to the Emperor.” She whispers for him alone to hear. His chest rumbles in delight at her words. She kisses the shell of his ear and then pulls away to look him in the eyes. His hand comes up to the back of her neck. “Won’t you remind me why, Emperor?”

He brings her closer. Their noses brush against each other. His heated eyes bore into her. His heat spreads through her. Starts at the top of her spine and travels down. Causes goosebumps across her skin before it comes to rest between her legs.

“You’ll have me then?” His voice is heavy when he asks. Her eyes flutter close and she nods.

“Yes.” She whispers it against his lips. She wastes no time in waiting for him and closes the gap between them.

He moans softly against her lips. Moves so that he can bring his arms around her back. Crush her against him. He tilts his head for better access to her lips. Moves his head away for breath before bringing them together again.

He moves one of his arms so that his hand comes to rest at her side. His fingers drum against her side. Play with the zipper of her dress. Asks silently for permission. She brings her hand up to her side. Covers his hand with her own and pulls the zipper down.

He pulls away from her, moves so that he kisses down her neck. His hand comes up from her side and rubs at her shoulder, tries to push away the fabric. He nips at each new expanse of skin exposed to him, pushing the dress further off her shoulders.

She pulls her arms inwards so that the sleeves of the dress come off. Brings her hands up to Kylo’s cheeks and cups them. She pulls him up and captures his lips with her own again. Holds him in place with one hand as the other maneuvers her dress out of the way. Pushes the bodice down her body. Her skin prickles at the chill in the room. She pulls him closer to her, moans into their kiss when his chest rubs against her breast.

He groans against her, his chest rumbling in delight. His hands come up to her back to hold her against him. They pull off her quickly, however. She’s about to pull away to ask him why but she can feel his hands moving together. She can hear the squeaking of leather as he pulls his gloves off.

His hands find her back again when the gloves are off. The heat of his hands radiates against her back. She shivers against them, anticipation prickling at her skin instead of the cold. The heat of his hands travels down her spine and she pulls away from him.

His lips find their way back to her neck. Soft, light kisses as he moves further down her body. He pushes her back into the couch, forces her to recline as he kisses her collarbone. Her skin twitches with anticipation when he moves away again.

He lightly bites a mark into the junction of her neck, elicits moans from Rey as he does so. He pulls back, admires his handiwork for a moment. His eyes hungrily look over her body. Take in the disheveled look her. Growls softly when he notices the slight flush across her chest and the hardness of her nipples.

He moves back into her again. Nips lightly at the mound of her breast. Kisses at the valley between them. His big hand comes to one of her breasts. Gently rubs at the hard bud there. He brings his mouth to focus on the other one. Gently licks at it while she gasps with each movement.

He sits back and watches the way her chest moves with each intake of breath. His eyes are on hers when his hands move to her waist. He pushes the dress further down, waits for her to lift her butt so he can continue. He brings it far enough down that she can kick her legs and it falls with a small thump to the ground. 

He moves back, hunches himself over her so that he can continue showing her with his affection. His hands skirt her side, tickle at her ribs. His lips move further down. The feeling of them cause her stomach to twitch. She laughs breathless at the feeling.

He pulls himself back up. His eyes find her own as he hooks his fingers into the waistband of her underwear. He breaths heavily against the excitement in his veins. He waits for her to allow him to continue. Her hands find his own and she covers his.

“I-“ She averts her gaze and bites her lip. “I haven’t done this in a long time.” She whispers. She brings her gaze up to his own.

A goofy smile dances across his features. Want grips at her heart and pulls through her blood. She wants to pull him to her and kiss him senseless. Wants to allow him back into every part of her again. Wants to confess how much she’s missed him. _Ben Solo_.

“I’ll take care of you.” He says it with a nod. He had said he was weak to her desires. If he was weak to hers, she’d allow herself her own weaknesses. She brings her hand to the back of his neck and pulls him down towards her. Captures his lips with her own. Moans softly into his mouth when he opens for her.

The cotton fabric of her underwear is smooth down her legs when he pulls and pushes them away. She instinctively brings her thighs together, even when the muscles of her thighs want to relax. She hears the soft thump as they meet with her dress on the ground.

His hands skirt down the length of her body. Slowly reveling in each expanse of skin open to him now. Rememorizes the feeling of her skin against his own. Remembering with touch how she felt against him. His hand snakes lower, fingers gripping to the edge of her hip.

He pulls away from her lips, moves to kiss down her body once more. Doesn’t pay as much attention to the places he’s been before. Now focused on the expanse of skin newly exposed to him. He moves himself so that he kneels next to the couch.

He kisses at the curve of her hip. Nips at the flesh of her outer thigh. Marks where he’s been with each pass. Her hands find his hair this way, tries to guide him when she wants him most. She tugs gently and he moans into her inner thigh.

“Can I?” He sounds so innocent when he asks. Like the first time. Always like the first time. Even when his hands find their way beneath the bottom part of her thighs. Gently tries to reassure her reflexes that it’s alright with the rubbing of his thumbs.

She nods dumbly. Slowly spreads her legs and hooks one leg over his shoulder. She hiccups a gasp when he bites softly at the junction of her inner thigh. Moans lowly when the warmth of his tongue spreads over where she’s needed him most. Sucks in a breath, bites at her lower lips, and watches the movement of his jaw against her. Revels in the sensation of that flame pulsing between her thighs.

She swallows hard before gasping for breath again. Feels her toes curl against the muscle of his shoulder. Feels the muscles in her tights clench. The slow ball of pleasure forming in the base of her belly.

“That’s,” A moan interrupts her train of thought. “That’s really good.”

The rumble of a laugh vibrates against her and he pulls away. He moves his head back and leans it against the thigh closest to him. He brings his hand up and rubs his thumb against the spot of pleasure.

“An Emperor,” His fingers move further down as he speaks. His middle finger rubs along the slit of her, wets itself with her arousal. A smirk tugs at his lips. “Should be good for his Empress.”

She digs her heel into his shoulder playfully. “You nerf herder.” Breathlessly laughs before sucking in a sharp breath with the movement of his finger. He pushes his finger gently into her. Slowly maneuvers it so that she can relax against it.

His mouth is hot against her again. Soothes what little ache has started at her core. He always moves like he’ll break her, afraid to scare her away. She tugs at his hair, pushes his mouth harder against her. That small bundle of heat sparking in low in her stomach.

It crackles and burns when a second finger joins the first. Stretches and soothes in slow motions. Timed perfectly with the movement of his tongue. Each stroke feeds the flame in her belly. The fire spreads through her veins, causes her body to move on its own.

Both hands find his head. Her fingers grip tightly into the mess of raven hair. The leg hooked around his shoulder tenses. Her toes curl. Her back lifts from the couch. Each muscle at full attention.

“Ben I-“ Her words rush from her lips before she can even finish the sentence. The roar of blood rushing through her body is all she hears. Her body shakes as the fire rips through every muscle. That small bundle of pleasure exploding through each cell. The tension in her muscles dissipates as the orgasm fades.

He takes his mouth away from her and crouches. Sends kisses up her body until he’s leaning over her. Kisses her like a parched man in a desert. Moans against her lips when her hands come up to the front of him. Keeps their lips locked even when his hands come up to help her remove his own clothing.

When his chest is bared to her, her hands instantly find his collarbone. Her fingers find the small scar left from before. Trace and savor the memory of it. She bites at his bottom lip. Revels in the groan that’s rip from his throat.

She traces what she remembers. The scar on his collarbone. The scar on his waist from the bowcaster bolt. Her finger tips brush softly against his skin. Feels the muscles twitch with each spot. Not used to feeling her there anymore but so anxious for her. Heat radiates from his chest where ever she touches. She remembers burning in it. Wants to burn in it again.

He pulls away from her and comes to stand next to the couch. He scoops her up into his arms. Holds her close to him before moving away from the center of the room. Towards the doorway that leads to the bedroom, she knows. Anticipation quickens her heart. She lets her hands wander over the expanse of his chest. Stop to feel the beat of his heart against her palm.

The bed squeaks softly against her weight when he carefully puts her down. She scrambles to sit up, to keep her hands on him. She moves to busy her hands, tries to help remove his pants. They come off easily enough, puddle around his feet when he pushes everything down. 

He brings his knee up onto the mattress, forces her backwards. She loops her arms around his neck and falls completely back. The weight of him is familiar and comfortable. Electric and erotic.

His lips find hers quickly as he tries to position himself properly. Moves himself so that her legs are positioned on either side of his waist. He pushes himself back up and away from her. Sits up on his knees. His hands find her thighs and tug her towards him.

“Call me that again.” He pleads. His hand envelopes his cock, pumps at it once before shifting forward. She wiggles her hips, tries to move herself closer to him. Both his hands come to her hips. Thrusts his hips forwards enough that he rubs himself against her folds. Her breath catches in her throat. She bites at her lip.

“You’ll have to give me a reason to.” She says it breathlessly. He laughs under his breath. Grips himself again and positions himself properly. Her heart pounds with the anticipation of him. She shifts her hips, wants to push him in herself.

He pushes himself slowly into her. Tries to let her remember the feel of him again. Stops when she winces in discomfort. Let’s her breathe through the slight discomfort. Waits for her to tell him that she’s okay. Seats himself fully inside of her when she’s comfortable enough. Watches the movement of her chest with each gasping breath.

She pulls him down again so that she can kiss him. Tries to slow her heart with each kiss. Open herself back up to him again. She reaches through the force for him. Aches to feel him again in every way. He groans into her kiss and pulls his hips back.

He gives himself to her. Pushes steadily into her. Opens himself and he slots back into the empty spot in her heart. His anticipation and excitement bubbles through her veins. His worry and loneliness wash through her. His love for her pounding in her chest.

Her hands come up and wrap around his shoulders. She pulls him to her, rubs her cheek against his neck. Only notices then that tears had fallen down her face. From the pleasure and the wholeness.

“Ben.” She whispers breathlessly into his ear. Brings her hand into his hair. Her other hand roams his back. Her legs come up to circle his waist. The fullness of him lights that fire in her stomach again. She feels his lips at her neck.

“Rey,” He pulls back so that he can look at her. Her hands fall away from his shoulders. “I can’t last longer.” His hips thrust without rhythm now. She nods and pulls him back down. Captures his lips with her own. Wants him to know that it’s been a long time. She knows.

He pushes his hands underneath so that he can hug her to him. He groans against her lips and pushes himself fully into her. A different warmth fills her and she can’t help the small moan from leaving her lips at the thought of it. He pulls back away from her, eyes big and muscles tense.

“It’s alright,” She wiggles her trapped arms between them. Taps her fingers against his shoulder the best that she can. “They gave me another implant after Mae was born.” The muscles in his body instantly relax.

He brings himself back, gently pulls himself out of her. Gently maneuvers them so that he can move the covers back. Rey slides her body underneath them. Kylo joins her a moment later. He pushes himself against her and pushes her so that she’s on her side. He cuddles up against her back, slides his arms in front of her. Hugs her against him.

“It’s been too long, Empress.” He says it with a kiss to the back of her neck. Moves her hair out of the way for better access. Rubs his thumbs softly into her sternum. Tucks himself into her. “I hope that has not effected your opinion.”

“Hmm,” She hums. “Maybe it has.” She laughs when he nips at her ear.

“I’d love to change your mind,” He starts and kisses behind her ear. “If you’d allow me more than one night?”

“Well,” She shrugs her shoulders. “If my duties are reinstated, then I may just be too busy for physical pleasures.”

“Your duties will be reinstated.” He promises. “And those duties will be stressful. Allow me to be your stress reliever.”

“Hm,” She mocks like she’s thinking. “That may work but you see,” She turns her head so she can see him. “My duties are not just of the Empress nature. I am a mother.”

“She’s made friends already.” Any mirth is wiped from his eyes. “She’ll be fine.”

“She could use more.” She turns away from him. Brings her arms up to cover his own. Squeezes them so that he’s forced to hug her. “Maybe a powerful friend.”

“You want me close to her?” The confusion rings through his voice.

“You may find you like her.” She says it matter of fact. “I’ve been told she is very much my daughter.” His chest rumbles against her back with the ghost of a laugh.

“I cannot promise anything,” He whispers. “But for you I will try.”

She sighs and closes her eyes. She’s done what she sought to do. If he can become close to her, he can help protect her against those who wish her harm. He’ll protect her even without knowing that she is his daughter. Won’t paint an even larger target on Mae’s back.

She tries to even out her breath. Doesn’t fight against the weight of sleep in her mind. She should get up and leave. Go back to Mae. The comfort of his chest against her back lulls her. She decides she’ll get up before Mae does. Go back to Mae first thing. She drifts into sleep, hears his voice softly in her ear.

“I’ve missed you, Rey.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I can explain my absence.
> 
> The holiday got a bit crazy there. Then I started back at work. And also smut takes me a lot longer to type out.
> 
> Again, I haven't re-read all of this. I've done bits and pieces as it's taken me ages to write this.


End file.
